Friday, 25 January 2008

Too Fast

I was just sitting quietly on my red rocket when all of a sudden it seemed too take off like a nitro infused formula one racing machine.

The look on my face says it all........agggghhhhhhhhh. I was shitting myself. I mean how was I going to be able to slow down without a parachute breaking system. Then I heard some giggling and looked around to see the cause of my speed and there it was. A sprinting ginga.

This was no ordinary ginga, he appeared to have the rage..... maybe that does make him an ordinary ginga? How was I going to slow him down so that we both didn't launch into space at super sonic speed. I had an idea.

"cookie" I shouted. The ginga stopped mid stride and started to sniff the air, he could smell the golden loot. Off he ran with his little trotters clicking on the wooden floor. I was safe.... temporarily. Who knows where the red menace will rise again, beware everyone.

Sunday, 13 January 2008

More from Jude Chicca Chicca Chango

My kid brother (the orange person) just had his birthday and I have found that it is much more satisfying to play with other people's toys.



Here I am playing with Asher's Elmo. He also got a ride on Zebra which I pretend is a bucking bronco and I have a great ole time being "thrown" from its back.

My 3rd Birthday is coming up on 1st March and Mum promises me a Thomas Party. I can't wait to see my birthday cake!

Here is a video of me singing again... this time it's the last half of the Thomas Song - I will print the full lyric so that you can sing along with me. I am a very GOOD singer - often likened to Pavarotti.

Engine Roll Call:-

They're 2 they're 4 they're 6 they're 8

Shunting trucks and hauling freight

Red and Green and Brown and Blue

They're the really useful crew

All with different roles to play

From Tidmouth Sheds or far away

Down the hills and round the bends

THOMAS AND HIS FRIENDS!

Sing it with me now...


Friday, 28 December 2007

Thomas fanatic

You know you have a problem when the only song you can sing is the Thomas song.

Sunday, 23 December 2007

Cheerio


Mum said that Dad always writes stupid things so I have taken over and will now write something serious and you can all see how boring it is to do it this way.
Yesterday I got up and played with my trains, then me and dad went to the shops. I didn't have my afternoon sleep because "I haven't", mum took me to the shops to get a new Thomas DVD (apparently Dad says she can't budget). When we got home I had cheerios for dinner and went straight to bed.
Exciting eh and oh so fun to read.
Merry Crimbo

Tuesday, 18 December 2007

A shark at rest...

This is what a shark does in his "down-time" ie: when he's having some time off for being a human killing machine - he watches a spot of tele.

And here I am just being cute. See I am wearing my "scuba suit" that Nana Vicki made for me. This scuba suit is necessary to contain the nappy within its recesses. If I am not put to bed with this suit on then little fingers take off the nappy and ALL SORTS of horrors then occur.
Santa Claus is coming to visit me (not Asher though) in less than a week. I can't wait to hear the pitter-patter of reindeer feet on the roof and know he is filling my stocking with Thomas & His Friends!!
Merry Christmas everyone.
Jude over and out.

Thursday, 6 December 2007

Jude Irwin - Crocodile Hunter

Hi I'm Jude Irwin.

Here I am hunting for crocs. They are very angry animals as they have an enlarged medula oblongata. This is reallly dangerous folks - don't try this at home!!

You can't see the reptile in this shot as I have already caught it, skinned it and taken it to the taxidermist. I can catch most evil creatures apart from one........ the evil and wily Asher.

This monster is known for its quick wit, speedy movement, scaly skin and its ability to take my most favoured toys. You can often here its call, it sounds like "da, da, da, da" and has an evil laugh.

If you see it can you please let me know where it is? it shall be the next scalp in my trophy cabinet.

Jude "I hate Bindi cause she's ugly" Irwin

Thursday, 15 November 2007

Say Icecream


You want a smile for the camera? I willl give you a smile. Just don't steal the I to the C to the E Cream.
I told dad today that he has a bad moustache and I told mummy that she does poos on the tooooooilet.
I like to take my nappy off and find "special" paint. It is a nice brown colour that matches the paint on the wall.
Poo boy out.

Thursday, 25 October 2007

An Artsy-Fartsy One...


And here is the final instalment in our family photos from the professionals entitled "Us2 - Boys"

Saturday, 13 October 2007

We are family



Look at the picture we had made. 1 skinny little English dude snapped a couple and came up with this. I reckon it is okay - there is probably only one person who could have done better but I guess he is in the picture with his mum, dad and younger brother.
Sit back with a coffee and enjoy our beauty.
Gimp out

Sunday, 7 October 2007

The All Blacks are Pants!!

These are our "fake smiles" for the camera. We are showing brotherly solidarity but are none too pleased about the fact the All Blacks let us down YET AGAIN and got booted out of the World Cup.

In fact, Asher was so heartbroken that he ate Joe Rokocoko - you can see Joe's remains around Asher's mosh and on his bib.
Cousin Nerys - we feel your pain.

Saturday, 15 September 2007

THE CLAW!!!!

Can you see it? The dreaded crushing crunching CLAW??? I had to barricade myself into the corner cupboard in the kitchen to save myself... luckily I survived to tell the story.

We went to have some family photos taken recently. I haven't seen them yet but Mummy & Daddy tell me I am pretty handsome and the photos are works of art.

I am a big boy now and go No. 1 on the toilet on a regular basis. I use the big toilet and I don't even need the pathetic "kiddie" seat... that's for amateurs. I am yet to squeeze a No. 2 on the porcelain throne but it won't be far away. I will soon be wearing my Thomas undies just like the big kids at daycare (or "Big Plow Plow" as I call it).

Ta-ta for now
Jude

Thursday, 23 August 2007

Water-Child

Here I am in the bath with a spiky do, a UFO squirter and a goofy look on my face.

I have a bad case of "purple diarrohea" or should that be verbal diarrohea? I talk talk talk all the time - I ask "who's that guy?" a lot and sing lovely songs and nursery rhymes. My Nana Vic asked Mummy whether she took fish oils when pregnant with me because I am shaping up to be a genius!!!

I love my little brother Asher - we play together quite a bit. I pat him on the head and poke him in the eye from time to time, but Asher likes it.

I now also have a cousin called Nerys way over on the other side of the world - I am looking forward to meeting her via webcam some day soon.

What do I want? I want to go and stay with my Nana & Poppa D this weekend WITHOUT MUMMY AND DADDY for the first time ever. I am such a big boy now that I can do this without it worrying me in the slightest (I hope...) Mummy better remember to pack my trains or there will be trouble.

Monday, 13 August 2007

Spiderman comes in the night




On candystripe legs the spiderman comes softly through the shadow of the evening sun stealing past the windows of the blissfully dead. Looking for the victim shivering in bed, searching out fear in the gathering gloom and suddenly a movement in the corner of the room!

There is nothing I can do when I realize with fright that the SPIDERMAN is having me for dinner tonight!

Sleep Well my Pretties...

Thursday, 19 July 2007

Thursday, 5 July 2007

Poppa's Brain

Poppa Thomas came to see me the other day. He pulled this thing out of his ear. It is his brain. He didn't seem to change too much once it was removed. I used my Bob hammer and my crushing crunching claws on it then I put it carefully back in. He seemed to work much better after I had tinkered with the shrivelled up membrane.

I added some extra neural pathways into his cerebal cortex and his cerebellum. He can now make reasoned arguments and will be able to control his bladder better. I guess you will no longer struggle to talk your way out of having wet patches in the front of your pants now will you Poppa.

I have also wired him up to give me lollies whenever I say the word Skarloey. Don't give me any of those stink lollies either Poppa, I want Penguin Naturals. If you do not obey I will work on some other areas of your grey matter.

Skarloey
Skarloey
Skarloey
Skarloey
Skarloey

Jude out.


Monday, 18 June 2007

I ate his liver

Nemo was getting a bit lippy so I dealt it to him. Yeah you can see his tail popping out but he can't be saved.

My swim lessons are going really well. I can't kick and paddle like the 18 month old kids but man you should see my bombs. Those little suckers don't even see it coming. I line them up and then ...... damn, just like I have been dropped from the enola gay.

Jude (& Nemo) out

Friday, 8 June 2007

I am a little egg beater

I like the egg beater, especially when it has sugary icing on it.

People have said that licking an egg beater makes you cross-eyed. Personally I don't believe it, there is no proof .

I have been pretty good recently, I now count to 4, do high 5s and can give a bit of skin.

All the chicks love me.

Jude

Tuesday, 22 May 2007

Can I fix it?

Damn right I can.

Now where did I put my hammer.

Saturday, 19 May 2007

Roger - that's a 10-4 Little Fat Buddy


Here I am in my new Red Hawk chopper. I had to go rescue a small fat 4 month old baby who answered to the name"Asher" from the jaws of his exersaucer the other day. He wasn't very grateful.
You can just glimpse Great-Poppa Dick to the left of the photo. He is madly trying to take photos of me with his camera. It's like having my own personal paparazzi (correct term is "Popparazzi" according to Nana Vic).
I am a very good little boy. I rarely have tantrums and those that I do have can be dealt with by giving me treats or "tweats" as I call them. I also respond well to threats of having my trains taken away. I have an affinity for taking my nappy off at the moment. My parents found me lying (bare) bottom up the other night with my nappy and a pool of urine beside me. Lucky for them it was just No. 1!!!! Next time they might not be so lucky...
Anyway, time for me to retire to my boudoir. Take care y'all.
J.E.T

Tuesday, 1 May 2007

Now I have to share!!!???


As if it isn't bad enough that I am not the sole centre of attention anymore, I now learn that I have to SHARE stuff with my little brother... like photos!! What's with that?


Anyway, here's me and Asher with Nana & Poppa D - I am not amused. Asher looks pretty happy though - probably 'cause he knows he's in MY photo and on MY nana's knee!!
I won't mess with that baby though - have you seen what he's gonna do to cousin Noah?
Ciao for now
Jude